But, I hate to be a party pooper so I'm trying to work on it. I think everyone knows in their head that just loving your children is more important than all of the "how"s. But do you find that "just love them" doesn't cut it on the rough days? Are there things that bring us peace when we don't think we're doing a good job? As I'm thinking about the essence of what made baby two so much easier than baby one, I'm thinking of these things:
Remind yourself that you are doing a good job. Everybody worries about not doing it right and nobody has it all together - even if it looks like they do.I guess those are the things I tell myself.
Ask for help. Accept help when it's offered. You don't need to "accomplish something" today. Caring for the baby IS accomplishing something.
It doesn't hurt the baby to cry for a few minutes. If it breaks your heart, try reminding yourself that it's normal. If it doesn't break your heart that's just fine; you are still a good mom.
If nothing is working, take the baby outside. If nothing else, you can be waiting in the driveway when someone else arrives home.
Talk to the baby and narrate the day.
Take some moments just for yourself.
I'm amending this post to tell you what they did with the advice, since it was such a neat idea! They had a prepared eight by eight inch scrapbook (simple pages - decorative paper with one embellishment in most cases, possibly from a kit). Each page had a spot marked to put your 4x6 card with your advice. The cards themselves had a decorative border so they added to the look. You slipped your own card into a page when you arrived, so that by the end of the party, they had a complete album to send home with Mommy-to-be! It was neat to flip through and read people's advice. I love that it was ready to go at the time of the shower, rather than having to be put together later.